We do not heal the past by dwelling there; we heal the past by living fully in the present. – Marianne Williamson
I appreciate this quote from Marianne Williamson and use it often in my anger management classes. Sometimes people dwell on the things that happened years ago, while others tend to dwell on last week. Dwelling in the past whether it was last week or 30 years ago, serves no purpose in our lives today.
I kept this in mind when I was developing angermanagementonline.com because I realized that most people were allowing their past to interfere with moving on in their lives. What happens when you spin your wheels in the past? Anger! Anger is a secondary emotion our anger management class teaches you how to figure out what is happening/thinking first so that you understand your secondary emotion of anger. Ruminating about the past and maybe even mistakes you have made will keep you living in your past life… in your present life.
Anger is a secondary emotion
Do you sometimes wish you could press the rewind button in your life? Are you struggling with major regrets about your past? Are you replaying past memories in your mind over and over again? Maybe you even feel ashamed of your past.
Self reflection is healthy; however, dwelling can be self destructive, preventing you from enjoying the present and planning for your future. You don’t have to stay stuck in the past. It is a choice you are making for yourself. You can choose to start living in the moment; maybe you just need a little guidance or nudge in the right direction.
Anger Management Online isn’t just about anger and how to manage it. In our anger management classes we take a look at dwelling and what purpose it serves in your life. Lingering guilt, shame and anger are a few of the feelings that keep you stuck in the past. Some people think if they stay miserable long enough, you will eventually be able to forgive yourself. I don’t think staying frozen in time works. The world moves on with or without you. You miss today because you are looking at yesterday.
Don’t distract yourself from the present any longer. If you feel like anger is holding you back and you keep stuffing down the bad feelings and punishing yourself, it is time to make some changes. It could be just as simple as a cognitive behavioral anger management class. In our anger management classes at angermanagementonline.com we help you to look at the past, acknowledge it and then move you forward into the present. We don’t believe in spinning tires when there are better ways to move forward in your present life. Let’s get started living today…